Last night I went over to Yvonne's house and watched the Eurovision contest. It was my first Eurovision--a very special occasion indeed! Those of you in America have of course never been privileged to view this spectacle, and for you I wish I could convey the utter cracktastic awesomeness of the Eurovision experience. But, thanks to the wonder of YouTube, you can experience it for yourself. Here's a short guide.
The first thing you need to understand is that everyone who performs for Eurovision is really, really bad. No serious artist would go anywhere near it. I think the most famous person to perform a song in the Eurovision contest is Céline Dion--that pretty much sums it up right there.
Here, for example, is an act of pretty typical badness: Shame, Spain! That should give you a general idea of the direness of the proceedings.
Or, take Ireland. I was actually rooting for Ireland, for obvious reasons, and Ireland does indeed hold the record for most Eurovision wins (it's also the only country to have won three years in a row). But this year's entry was, shall we say, dismal? It was Brian Kennedy performing "Every Song Is a Cry For Love." (Right of the top of my head: like, say, "Psycho Killer"?) I can't find a clip of his live performance, which was mostly very dull and very, very green, but to give you an idea of the utter, utter cheese, here's the music video. *snerk*
But there were some shining stars. One was the winner, Finland. I...don't actually want to say anything about this. You just have to watch it: unspoiled, utterly surprised. So, just remember that most of the acts were in the same vein as Spain's entry or Brian Kennedy's pap, and then watch this.
They totally deserved to win. Still, I think my heart belongs to the cheeky Lithuanian monkeys responsible for this. See? Now that's awesome. That's taking the piss. Ireland appreciates piss-taking ability: we (see how possessive I've gotten?) gave our largest percentage of votes to Lithuania. So why are we stuck entering greasy dullards like Brian Kennedy? Yeesh.
Still. Everyone knows that this is the greatest Eurovision entry ever. Pure Irish glory, that. *vbg*