Marks & Spencer, further solidifying its status as THE DEVIL, is selling mini mince pies, 12 for 3 euro. I was in there the other day, and all these packages of happy, Christmas-looking pies were stacked up by the cash register. Now, I really shouldn't be spending money on anything unessential. So I thought: I know! I'll get the cashier to tell me that mince pies are essential! Watch:
Me: Are those mince pies?
Me: Not the kind with meat?
Cashier: No. Fruit.
Me: They don't have that kind of mince pie in the U.S.
Cashier: *blank look*
Me: You know, where I'm from?
Cashier: *blankety blank*
Me: See, accent? Oh, never mind. But yeah--I've never had a traditional Christmas mince pie.
Cashier: *is supposed to say, "No!" "That's awful!" "But you must!"* Do you need a bag?
Me: No, I've got one. *starts to pack groceries into used Arnotts bag, because in Ireland, supermarkets charge for bags* You know, just the other day, I was telling some friends of mine that I'd never had mince pie, and they were like, "How have you lived?"
Cashier: That'll be 19.24.
Me: *sigh* Why don't you thrown in some of those mince pies?
So Marks & Spencer really needs to train more enthusiastic cashiers. Because damn, mince pie is good! If you've never had any...How have you lived?
Finally, since I had five minutes to kill yesterday, here's a little cartoon mini-me:
Yep. Definitely plotting something nefarious. Just look at those shifty eyes!
On November 16th, 2005 11:53 pm (UTC), (Anonymous) commented:
--an actual person, that cashier; just a robotic THING. If you ever, in future, need encouragement about any kind of pie, come to me; I have a great store of enthusiasm about all things pie.
That is a very cute cartoon you--wherever did you find it?
Missing you, honey!
On November 24th, 2005 08:18 pm (UTC), (Anonymous) commented:
You are sorely missed this Thanksgiving! We are thinking about you and wishing you were at the table with all of us. In particular, I'm going to miss your well considered pie order--half of this, half of that, a dollop of whipped cream on top. No wait--make that on the side.
Love you & miss you.
D & G (That's right--Dolce & Gabanna)